8 Ways Men Unknowinly Kill Their Self Esteem

See some ways men unknowingly kill their esteems with their thoughts and behaviour

I genuinely believe that having low self esteem is a thing of the mind and with a decision you can end it (depending on how deep you are). Yes i agree that life can throw hard jabs at you and i agree that you’re human and some emotions aren’t so easy to ignore, but you can easily choose to ignore these emotions and do not allow them to engulf you and eat you up.

Below are some ways men unknowingly kill their esteems with their thoughts and behaviour

1. UNFAIRLY COMPARING YOURSELF TO EVERYONE ELSE: You interpret events in terms of standards that are unrealistic by focusing primarily on others who do better than you and then judging yourself inferior in the comparison. “He’s more successful than I am” or “Everyone did better than me on the test.”
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2. ALWAYS LABELING: This happens when you assign general negative traits to yourself and others. For example: “I’m not attractive,” or “He’s a horrible person.”

3. HAVING CATASTROPHIC THOUGHTS: This involves having the belief that something that has happened in the past or will happen in the future is so terrible and unbearable that you won’t be able to stand it. Example: “It would be absolutely terrible if we broke up.”

4. ALWAYS ASKING WHAT IF: Asking a series of questions about “what if” something happens and never being satisfied with the answers. For example: “Yeah, but what if I get nervous talking to her?”

5. MAKING POSITIVE ACCOMPLISHMENTS LOOK SMALL: Trivializing the positive accomplishments or behaviors of yourself or others. For example: “That’s what a good girlfriend is supposed to do, so it doesn’t count when she’s nice to me,” or “Those successes were easy, so they don’t matter.”
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6. OVER PERSONALIZING: Attributing a disproportionate amount of the blame for negative events to yourself and failing to see that certain events are also caused by others. For example: “My relationship ended because I failed.”

7. REGRETTING: This happens when you focus on the idea that you could have done better in the past rather than on what you could do better now. For example: “I could have had a better job if I tried,” or “I shouldn’t have said that.”

8. ALL OR NOTHING MENTALITY: You view events or people in all-or-nothing terms. For example: “I get rejected by everyone,” or “It was a waste of time.”
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